Growing up in Russia, a country known to be a patriarchal society, where men are the heads of the household, they make the money and the decisions in the house, while women are bound to basically sleep in the kitchen and take care of the children and the house. It was something normal and accepted in the Russian culture and most women didn’t mind it. However, things are slowly changing for the women and they are now more active parts of the society, holding high positions within companies, pursuing entrepreneurships, and becoming overall more independent. Not to say that housewives are not happy. My mother was a housewife most of her life until she divorced from my father and then pursued her career goals once in the USA. Being a housewife in Russia is not always peachy as it might seem to be for women who are housewives in the West. Many women are housewives because they do not have much choice for work or a career where they can move up fairly and respectfully. In addition, many men do not like their wives to work, particularly those with money. In Russia, many women cannot find jobs and when they do it is mainly for their looks. Some companies do not even hire anyone over 30. In many restaraunts, the waitresses are looked at as some sort of decoration versus a server who is there to do her job. In these types of jobs, many women are disrespected by the customers and treated as an opportunity to flirt.
Nonetheless, these things are changing and women are becoming a more powerful force in the Russian society. However, one thing is still very acceptable in the Russian culture. Cheating. Men are almost guaranteed to cheat in their marriages, regardless of whether or not the marriage is a happy one. A man could be perfectly happy with his wife but he will still cheat. The reasons for this phenomenon vary but mainly it is because there are always women out there who are willing to give themselves to married men. If you are a woman from Russia, you know this to be true. That is partly because there are more men than women in Russia, also partly because some women desire attention and financial security so they go for anyone who will have them. I am sure there are plenty of other reasons; however, we as women are the ones to blame in many cases. If there were no women who willingly would go home with a married man, then men would not have anyone to cheat with. Yes, you might argue that the mistress might not be aware that the man is married, but let’s be real. Women have great intuitions when it comes to men, and the man has to be a professional liar for a woman to really believe that he doesn’t have a family on the side. This being especially true in Russia, where many men are married at a young age and typically have a girlfriends on the side. Thus, women in Russia should do their research about the man they are dating and give it some time to get to know him before jumping into bed with him, to ensure that he is not in fact married and there are no red flags along the way.
So this brings me to my questions, how can we as women ensure that this doesn’t happen in Russia and perhaps other countries where this is a trend? How can we respect each other enough to not go after a married man (regardless of whether you know the wife or not)? How can we better work together to create a society for our children where family bond is respected, marriages are sacred, and cheating is not acceptable?
Is it really men vs. women or women vs. women?
Things I am thankful for: ice packs for my knees after a run, flower shops where I can arrange my own flowers, almonds (because they are a great snack and I love the taste), green tea, and comfy clothes for the house.
Advice of the Day:
I would like to give a reminder and some advice for taking care of your face and skin, and ways to do it, especially for ladies. Personally for me, I didn’t use to take care of my skin as I do now, now that I am approaching my 30th and maintaining my skin and overall body health has become more important than even before. I used to often fall asleep with my make up on, not cleanse my face properly, among other things that wear my skin out. In the last year or so I have made it a ritual to spend some time every day to ensure that my skin, specifically my face, is receiving the care it deserves and requires. As women we tend to have more sensitive skin and we age faster than men in many cases, thus we should pay more special attention to our skin. I highly recommend always, always erasing your makeup before bedtime, no matter how late you go home, or how tired you are. When make up stays on your face, it will soak into your skin, cause irritation, acne, aging, and many other negative effects. But, that is a no-brainer for most. Another important part of taking care of your skin is keeping it hydrated. You should drink plenty of water during the day, because water is the best cure and preventive medicine for most of your body but especially your skin. Also, find a moisturizer that works best for you and try to apply it within 60 seconds of washing your face in the morning and in the evening. I am personally a fan of Clinique products and L’Occitane. Yes, they are a bit on the pricey side but I found them to be the best fit for my skin and body. There are, however, more affordable options that can be found at any pharmacy or beauty store. The key is to find something that is best for your skin. You can consult a dermatologist or even your physician for best products to use, depending on your skin type and other factors. Finally, cleansing your face with masques and exfoliating your face on weekly basis (about once or twice a week) is a great way to keep away wrinkles, keep your skin looking radiant and fresh, and giving some love to your body and face.